True Story

"My son Jesus is in 4th grade and started running Cross Country last month. He’s done four meets so far and has improved his finishing position from 16th to 11th to 7th to 6th. There are ~100 kids in each race, so they’re decent results. His classmate David Garcia has won all four races, by a large margin each time.

After Jesus's 6th place the day before yesterday (which I attended), as I was congratulating him, he pulled my head down to his and whispered in my ear, “Do you think David Garcia's doping?”

I laughed and told him "Of course not!" but it got me thinking later. I just read your interview with the (Pro)wanker and took particular note of your words about doping at the Junior level. On further reflection, it saddens me that one of Jesus’s first logical leaps to explain the heroic athletic performance of David Garcia is that there must be some sort of doping or cheating going on…"

(Note: Names and other personally-identifying details have been altered to protect the identity of the subjects.)