Love Hurts, but so does Pittsburgh's Dirty Dozen

Think-a to za future: itza Saturday dopo Thanksgiving eeeeen Pittsburgh...Love Hurts, but does it-a hurta worse-a than za Dirty Dozen, Pittsburgh's hardest percorso in bicicletta? Non lo so and itza better that-a youa ... deeeecide! Ciao ciao!

Vs.

I-a personally think-a they'll both a-leave you tired-out in-a zee end...

Respectfully Responding to Requests to Reconnect

In the past two years I've reconnected with several people who were very important to me years ago, but with whom I'd lost touch over the years. Some of these reunions happened organically, some I initiated, and some came from the concentrated efforts others.


There was one person (not pictured above), lost to me, who I would occasionally try to reach out to via old and seemingly out-of-date contact information, but to no avail. Finally, however, after two years' of irregular attempts at reaching this person but never receiving a response (or even an indication that they were aware of my efforts to contact them) they wrote me through a third party today, saying:

"The reason I haven't responded to any of your requests is that I don't want to be in contact with you."

Um, OK... I'm not disappointed by this, and in fact am glad to finally know that this person considers our friendship dead because now I can scratch it off the list of things from my past that I thought might still have value now. But what is it with the notion of not balling-up and responding to the initial inquiry two years ago with something concise like, "Sorry, I'm not interested in being part of your life or having you as part of mine. You did have the correct email address for me, now please lose it."

You mean to tell me it took this person - with whom I was incredibly intimate in many ways for many, many years - two years to finally find the courage and respect to express their disinterest in reconnecting with me? Why not just have squelched it from the beginning?

There is a crucial point of note here: I was all over the world, from the jungles of Panama to the mountains of Taiwan to the deserts of the Middle East - and this person was as much a vagabond in many respects. I didn't even know if my occasional attempts to contact them were arriving anywhere. If it was a question of their living in the same neighborhood as me, I would have walked up to their front door, rang the bell, probably had the door slammed in my face (based on what I read today) & then moved on. But I wasn't even aware that my messages were getting through to any station.

So, if you're an adult, and someone from your past is trying to reconnect with you and they don't think they have your current contact information, but in fact do, and you're ignoring their requests because you're not interested, any annoyance that you feel past the point of the first attempted reconnect is your own fault. Because you could simply be honest with the person and say that you weren't interested in rebuilding a friendship. Why string it along and then act like you've been imposed upon, when you had the power the entire time to manage the length or frequency of interaction?

This goes for anyone who knew me from "before" (be that last month or during the last century): if you don't like me or you don't want to be in contact with me, but I've tried to contact you - just say that you don't want to know me! It's simple! But if you did know me and do want to reestablish contact, then you can find me through Facebook. The worst that could happen is I would say, "Sorry, I'm not interested in being part of your life or having you as part of mine. You did have the correct email address for me, now please lose it."

The Vapor Trail

So I finally, finally got around to taking this online dating personality test that I was introduced to some time ago...but never got around to taking. Too bad, as it would have been great conversation fodder for one of those less-than-serious moments. But that's me, always distracted by the more serious issues in life. Ha. Kind of. But not always.

Having no shame, and in the interests of content, I share my results with you - verbatim (disclaimer though: this is hardly an accurate profile. it's funny as hell though):

The Vapor Trail
Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Here today, gone today. You are The Vapor Trail. Are you in a relationship now?

What about now?

Vapor Trails can be highly charismatic people--unpredictable, confident, and magnetic. You're experienced. You know how to handle yourself in a relationship, and many people appreciate that. Many people, all in a row.

You've had your share of blissful beginnings, to be sure. But things almost never turn out how you'd like, do they? The problem is you're never happy with someone for an extended period of time. Relate to the following:

Vapor Trails especially need a girl who will laugh at their jokes. They're also the most likely male type to be haunted by serious regret.

FACT: A few of your exes, the ones you were best to, will always love you. Nice going.

Your exact male opposite: The Backrubber

Always avoid: The Intern (DGSD), The Maid of Honor (DGLM)

Consider: The Sudden Departure (RBLM)